mommy and me makeup class
Parenting,  Recommendations

So Your Kid Wants to Wear Makeup

Do You Wear Makeup?

I’m very curious. What are your thoughts on introducing kids to makeup? Do you have a hard fast rule about the appropriate age for wearing makeup? What is your own experience wearing makeup? Do you love it, hate it, or are you indifferent?

Truthfully, I have a relatively tumultuous relationship with makeup. I like to wear it on special occasions, and holy hell am I happy mascara was invented but the message in the media about wearing makeup as a means to look “better” is difficult for me to stomach. I have a strong belief that we all are magnificently beautiful. In fact, I confidently and frequently proclaim that nobody needs to wear makeup or change the way they look. Particularly, my kid.

But still, advertising seems to say, “Wear makeup and you’ll look flawless. Red lipstick looks great on everyone (that’s a bald-faced lie!) Wrinkles are ugly. False lashes, pouty lips, drawn-on eyebrows – you need them!” It’s hard to imagine beauty not being about looking prettier or better or younger. 

My experience is that over time I’ve become increasingly ashamed to even wear makeup, as if by wearing it, I’m saying I condone this outcry for perfection and societal compliance. I’m all about authenticity and being real. So makeup? How does that fit into my life? Can I wear makeup without feeling hypocritical? And until recently, I wasn’t really sure. 

What gave me the nudge to dig deeper? My daughter asked about wearing makeup. 

Her interest in makeup forced me to think about my preconceived notions about it. I began to research makeup’s history and talk with other makeup wearers to find out if my perspective was skewed and how I could approach the topic with her. I hoped to be intentional with my messaging. Being a parent really forces you to dig deep sometimes! 

So, Why Do We Wear Makeup Anyway?

One of the reasons, which is the first to cloud my judgment and make me want to hate makeup, is wearing it to appear more attractive or to fit in. It’s true, some people still use makeup as a tool of attraction, and that’s okay. What’s interesting is that I found many more reasons beyond attraction. 

The truth is makeup has been used by humans for a number of reasons throughout history. In fact, body art has been used for rituals and dance since the beginning of mankind. Painting nails, wearing perfume, and using cosmetics dates back 7,000 years! 

There are various reasons people wear makeup, so let’s take a look at a few of them. 

  1. Artistic Expression
  2. Self-care
  3. Confidence
  4. Community or Bonding
  5. Ritual
  6. Performance and Gender Play
  7. Fun

When I really thought about my reason for wearing makeup, it came down to confidence and self-care. As a teenager, it was more about bonding with my friends. Purchasing, sharing, and putting on makeup was an exciting pastime I shared with some of my closest friends. 

Modeling Makeup Usage For Your Kids

 mommy + me makeup session

Reflecting on my “why” was critical to how I’d approach the introduction of makeup to my daughter. I needed to consider how makeup had played a role in my life. I wanted her to understand its role in her life and how wearing makeup could be a positive experience. Admittedly, I questioned whether or not I’d be good at delivering this message to her about makeup, seeing how my own recent thoughts toward makeup were so negative.

I initially wanted to say things like, “Makeup is the devil.  Makeup is unnecessary. Makeup is for those who cave to societal pressures.” But oh how that contradicted my daily application of mascara and blush. And I knew deep down that makeup is not evil. It’s your intent and purpose for wearing makeup that really matters. And after looking into the history of makeup, I knew forbidding it wasn’t the answer. 

So there I was, left with the question: Should she do as I say, or do as I do? Even though my personal daily makeup usage is minimal, by me wearing makeup, I’m sending her a message that makeup is something I value. Telling her that she shouldn’t value it would be wrong and would never “protect” her from society’s messed up perception of how women should look. 

I wondered how not wearing makeup would actually give her more confidence? Will she be bolder and happier if she doesn’t wear makeup? It’s obvious to me now that makeup will likely have no effect on her self worth on its own. More likely, she’ll develop her own relationship with makeup based on what I model for her and the information she gathers from her peers, marketing, and EDUCATION!

The problem was, I’m no expert in makeup application. My knowledge of purchasing and applying makeup is pretty much at level zero. Reaching out to someone else seemed like the only way for her to get a proper introduction to the world of cosmetics. For me, it was important to find a person who could equip her (and me!) with the skills to purchase, apply, and use makeup with intent and purpose. 

Mommy + Me Makeup Session

By chance, I met Natalie Setareh. The timing was impeccable and, oddly enough, we met here in Germany but are both from Tucson, AZ. The odds of that happening are kind of unreal, so there was already a sisterhood emerging right from the start. Tucson is the biggest small town ever! 

I quickly learned that Natalie was a makeup artist who focuses on teaching her clients how to wear makeup. She just released a book called, “Be Your Own Makeup Artist” and hosts FB lives and records podcasts which focus on educating yourself about the makeup industry and how to apply makeup correctly. It sparked an idea in me! I wondered, if she could teach adults about makeup, could she offer a mini makeup workshop for me and my girl? Natalie was thrilled with the idea and thankfully added it to her list of services.

I’d like to share with you what we learned from our two hour “Mommy + Me” makeup session, so you can either replicate it on your own or, better yet, find a makeup artist who will offer you and your child a similar experience. 

Teaching Kids About Makeup

kids learning about wearing makeup

My Daughter’s Top 9 Takeaways

1) Why we wear make-up

Natalie talked to us about artistic expression and how makeup can be used to express ourselves the same way hairstyles, tattoos, and clothes can.

2) Makeup can send people messages (good & bad)

We talked about how Photoshop can change an image drastically and how filters can distort people’s real appearance. We also talked about how makeup in magazines and album covers is oftentimes trying to send a message to the viewer. For example, Lady Gaga might be telling a story through her appearance, and therefore with her makeup application.

Pay attention to the message you want to send. Wearing red lipstick was an example she used of trying to look older. What could happen if you try looking older than you are? Could it encourage older kids to have conversations with you that aren’t age-appropriate?

3) Makeup can be a bonding experience with your friends or parents

We talked about how shopping for and applying makeup together can be a fun activity, a way to bond with one another.

4) Being honest about wearing makeup

Natalie pointed out that since we were learning about makeup together (her and I) there was no reason to hide makeup from her parents. We can talk openly about makeup and make decisions together about its use.

5) Hygiene 

Natalie mentioned how germs from our hands go onto our faces, so we should wash hands before applying makeup and wash brushes after each use. NEVER share makeup!

6) Take care of your skin

We talked about NEVER using makeup to cover up bad skin. Rather, take care of your skin first with proper nutrition, washing, and moisturizing!

7) Finding the right color palette

Natalie had color wheels, which explained how colors work together. She talked with us about our skin tone and showed us blush, eye shadows and foundations that complement our individual skin tones. We have completely different skin tones, btw!

8) Be a smart consumer.

Read the ingredients list. Shop together and analyze the brands. Make sure you trust the brand and understand the pricing.

9) How to apply your makeup

Since my daughter is only nine, we didn’t have her apply foundation, but she showed her how to apply it by using me as the model. She took turns with my girl, by modeling for her and letting her apply it on herself and on me. 

She patiently guided us through an entire application of makeup, of course, we kept it simple. We had a ton of fun!

Teaching Kids How to Apply Makeup Correctly

color theory and skin tone

Here’s What We Learned About Applying Makeup:

  • Start with a clean face
  • Use a toner, then moisturize 
  • Use a large brush or your fingers to gently apply foundation, all the way down the neck and over the ears.
  • Remove excess with a beauty blender. (gently roll it across your face)
  • Curl eyelashes
  • Apply mascara slowly and carefully including all those little lashes in your eye crease. Make a mistake? No worries! Let it dry and remove it easily with a dry Q-tip. It comes off without ruining your makeup.
  • Eyeshadow stays on the bottom half of your lid and should be applied with a small brush. Again, wash the brush daily!
  • Blush starts at the apple of your cheek. (easy to find if you smile) then extends across the cheekbone. Use a medium sized-brush and tap the brush before applying the blush to skin. Pick a color that complements your skin tone. (think cool colored skin with cool colored lipsticks)
  • Lipstick should be applied by working your way from the edges of your lip to the middle. Pick a color that fits with your skin tone.

Find a Makeup Artist Near You

child reads a book about makeup

Ready To Talk About Makeup With Your Kid?

If you have any of the same concerns I had above, I highly recommend finding a makeup artist in your area that will consider a Mommy + Me makeup session. But if not, I hope this quick synopsis can at least serve as a guide for starting a discussion about makeup with your child. 

Be Your Own Makeup Artist

Maybe you can’t find a makeup artist that offers mommy and me makeup sessions, but that’s okay! If you want to know more about finding your skin tone or which brushes to purchase, Natalie has written an amazing book, which will guide you through the ins and outs of makeup purchasing, selecting, and applying!

If you yourself are as clueless as I am about how to apply makeup and what to purchase for yourself, then order Natalie’s book. Seriously. The stunning images and informative graphics make this book a pleasure to read and super easy to understand. It’s well organized and is absolutely loaded with helpful tips and advice about makeup, products, and skincare. You’re going to learn something new, even if you’re already pretty makeup savvy! I guarantee it.

PS. Stay tuned. We are lucky enough to have Natalie come back next month and share her expertise on what to purchase for a minimalist makeup bag.

Get updates when we release new content.

Subscribe

* indicates required

Please select all the ways you would like to hear from The Eclectic Mother:

You can unsubscribe at any time by clicking the link in the footer of our emails. For information about our privacy practices, please visit our website.

We use Mailchimp as our marketing platform. By clicking below to subscribe, you acknowledge that your information will be transferred to Mailchimp for processing. Learn more about Mailchimp’s privacy practices here.

meet Jenna at the eclectic mother

Hey Guys! I'm one of the writer's here at The Eclectic Mother. I have two children, 9 and 11. I'm on a mission to create the world's best community of women who want to see one another succeed. I like empowering women to be the best they can be. It's a privilege to hang out with you guys. Please let me know if you ever need anything! I've got your back!